I have been married for almost 2yrs. Separated for 11mos. My husband just willnot hear me. He works from 6 or 7am til 9pm, 5 days a wk. He is out of town on overnites 1 time each wk. I am disabled and can't watch our baby when I'm ill. I do well just to care for self when ill. I am thinking of the big D. He refuses to take any responsibility. That's one of the reasons I asked him to leave. If I'm ill, I call Mom. I'm sick of asking her to be here all the time, when he should help a little! Our life as one went sour when he laughed at me, when I thought we were spliting the income taxes 50/50. I can't believe, just because I don't work out of the home, he won't share! I was also raising his two boys from prev. marriage, by myself. He worked so much, that he'd come home and eat then to bed. I suffer headaches and illness got worse with all the stress I'm under. He goes to work and that's it! No help from him. I want to work it out. I'm afraid to try again. I'm the only one making all the sacrificing. Does God allow D, if there is neglect? Please reply. I need guidance.
Medikel

medikel - God hates to see His Children in pain, but He hates divorce and does not see this as a solution to your problem. In a situation like this God is calling you to love Him and trust Him more. As you do this, He will show you how to lead your husband closer to Him and develop a loving relationship. You cannot "fix" the problems with your husband, you can only strengthen you faith and pray that his heart will soften to the love of Christ.

Hi Medikel,

I feel for you, because we have disabilities too and we also don't have the help, on the positive you have your Mum, really treasure her, treasure that she comes, because mine died over 8 years now and I truly miss her at many different times. We don't have anyone to call when I need help or get sick.

I can also understand how u feel about ur hubby not being supportive, sharing, leaving u to do most stuff, I have experienced that and I see that all too often in a lot of marriages/relationships and it breaks my heart. I think I have only seen the exception to the rule only a couple of times in my life.

The Lord does not like divorce, however the Lord also does not like imbalanced weights or having his children neglected. The Lord definitely wants husbands to honour their wives and it says in 1 Peter 3:7....that husbands need to treat their wives with respect do this so that nothing will interfere with their prayers.

It is amazing how many dominating Christian men are too quick to tell me that wives must submit to their husbands, yet they deny that they have to submit to the wives. Nor do I have any of them say to me about in 1 Peter about respect for wives and it also says that Husbands need to honour wives in Corinthians I think.

As I was writing this the answer came to me what needs to be done here but also in my horrible situation. It's time to shift your focus off of the problem, off of your husband, get quiet and rest in the Lord. Try not to get upset about your husband's rebelliousness or self centred attitude and his lack of care to you and your family. Instead pray to the Lord, Cry out to him for help and the answer will come to you on what you need to do and then do it, because it will be Holy Spirit inspired, God breathed, it won't be wrong, it will be the right solution. U will also feel relaxed and calmed by the Lord's presence. Instead of reacting, you will be responding to the Lord's call on your life and doing what he requires you to do. Whatever it is the Lord will also give you the strength you need to do what needs to be done and the boldness and courage to implement what needs to be implemented. Please remember Jesus came and calmed the storms, just like he did all those years ago with the disciples, he can do for us with all our storms.

Have courage, take your focus off the externals and place it firmly on Jesus he will never let you down. With God all things are possible.

love and blessings in the Lord,

Serenity

Medikel
My heart goes out to you and I pray for healing of your marriage and physical healing of your body. I am believing for a few miracles. Jerimiah 29:11 "for I know the plans I have for you says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope". Give it all to Christ and trust him with all your soul and strength. Have you believed in the son of God, Jesus Christ that he died and rose again for your sins? I suggest you read the book of John and become born again for Jesus said you must be born again in John 3rd chapter. Then renew your mind daily with the word of God and pray much daily.

God does not want you to Divorce! I know that sounds so straight forward, but I am going through this same situation right now. It is Very hard and no one will understand until they are going through it. Well the answer is PRAY! Pray for your husband to accept you and you to accept him. Also there is a book called the five love languages. READ IT if you have not already. It is awesome! I can not tell you what to do but put all your turst in the Lord and He will bless you!

Lord, help bless this marriage. I know you have something great in return for them, but please help them accept eachother. You put them together for a purpose. I know that it was not a mistake that they made, but a learning expirence! Help guide this beautiful couple in the right path and shine in them so that they can be a good witness to eachother and to the world around them. Thank you for all the things we overlook that we are so thankful for. And Lord thank you for the gift of life!
In Your Precious Name,
AprilC