I'll make this as short as I can. Basically, my husband has fallen back into the same ol' routine of drinking, and staying out "with the boys" and all that. I left him once because of it. After many long hours, days and months of prayer, God directed me to get back together with him. He said that he couldn't stand living without me and promised there would be no more.

Well, there is more and I just can't take it, but I am stuck as far as making it on my own, there is no escape. I wonder why God was so insistent on me getting back together with him in the first place. Am I being punished for something? All that is happening is that I am getting hurt like hell, and my husband doesn't seem to care about my feelings, his promise or anything but "the boys" and the bottle.

I know God hates divorce, but I have begged Him to help me and He won't. Now I'm just stuck in a private hell that nobody seems to care if I survive or not.

I'm lost and don't know what to do. It doesn't seem that God cares either. I'm truly at the end of my...everything. I'm dying inside...all alone.

My heart goes out to you - I pray that God gives you a miracle.

Hello Brenda,

Our prayers are lifted up for you and your marriage. In misery, what do we do, which road do we take? Each of us are given such choices daily, some intimate, painful and close to our hearts, some not so. One of the glories of the Bible is that in it, we will find living examples of these choices wherein God has spoken through his prophets to show us the way to go.

In the flesh, in our hurts and pain, the way out seems the best way. It is interesting the thoughts that race through our minds when we hurt. With great rush, we think of things that seem right at the time, get even, teach them a lesson, or simply "that's it".

The Apostle Paul had a "thorn in the flesh" that hindered him for many years. We do not know what it was. We do know your's at this time is your husband's broken promises and the resulting break down of respect for him.

God doesn't make mistakes, and it is likely said that you, Brenda, are the closest Christian person your husband may come in contact with. How you respond to your husband's indignities will in large part be a testimony to him of the power of God in you and Christianity as a whole. No, you are not a door mat to be trampled on nor is God into placing guilt trips on us to force us to do one thing or another. We can learn how the mind of Christ works from his direction to Paul, as said in 2 Corinthians:

2 Corinthians 12:

9And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

10Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.

In pain, striving to minister to thousands and keep the church together, Paul reaches out to the Lord in agony, yet God tells him simply that "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness."

Yes, Brenda, God's strength was sufficient for Paul and for us as well, in all matters. When we are in our weakest, most desperate situations, God is at His strongest in us. Our faith is perfected in times of agony and so will it be for you. Greater times lie ahead for you and your husband. Allow His grace to be sufficient for you at this time. God bless you.

Nick P.

Hello Brenda,

Lord Jesus Christ always gives us the answer even at times we may not want to hear it or do it, or because of the situation it truly sucks, but when we surrender to Him, and we ask He gives us a quickening spirit Isaiah 11:2 and we can then get propelled into the amazing ...

Brenda, we understand, that living in a private marriage nightmare that is akin to living in ur very own world war three mate...awful, u feel isolated traped, alone and like no one understands but He does and is doing something about it. Intercessory prayers took place about this for the global, we have cried about this for awhile, and so we know He cares, also what He gets us to do, He cares and even I look and see us now and yes He cares, and He answered that he was going to do something about it, by two double rainbow covenants that appeared two times while we were calling out for His women, children and youth with Him answering that He was going to do something about it, big time... also we experienced on July 7th when one part of the world was getting evil happening, we were on the other side of the world experiencing a being set free, with a message, that the captives are free now go set free the captives, and this what He is doing...
Brenda In Lord Jesus Christ you are set free in Lord Jesus Christ's name, amen.

And we have seen this and also experiencing Him setting people free from all sorts of things,...and you need to hang on to Him, because what you see and are experiencing at present is a process...and is not the outcome.

His people have been out of order and He is bringing them back into His order and while this is taking place things can appear to be topsy turvey, at times you don't know whether u r arthur or martha, and equivalent to all hell breaking lose, and it is, for through this time, the evil is coming into light so it can be released, and is seen clearly, no more denying it is there...However that is not the end of it, for He is bringing people into Him, even ones you least expect, even the ones that are down right pains in the bottom, and many amazing things will happen as well as the challenging and difficult.

What has been happening and is happening, He is concerned about it, and mate He dosen't like His women mistreated nor abused nor His children; nor being unprotected to be devoured and ravished by the wolves in sheep's clothing .... but He also doesn't want His people also to retaliate with what is going against what He is doing....which can be difficult at times, when u r feeling all this flood of indignant wrath and the one you are married to behaving immature, and not being the husband He needs to be and should be and that is what u r seeing not just sin, but immaturity. And we can not do this, be like Him, without the Love Strength, Grace, Power of Him coming through the Holy Ghost and Holy Spirit. We also have been called to pray for His men to and this has to do that they enter into His completion being His plans....that they all take their part, and be the men He created them to be....amen.

What you need to be focusing on at this time is Lord Jesus Christ, remember we seek Him first and He adds everything unto us...We give our allegiance to Him, first and foremost and then we can give it to each other and He is the head of our home, our family our body of Christ....He is what makes a marriage one, you can not have marriage without God, because God created marriage and covenants....What I have learnt through our own process out of abuse, is when I worried about others not being where we were going, or not going together in my walk in Lord Jesus Christ, He told me to go anyway, and He brought my beautiful family, being my son along with what He was doing in me, and has deepen the relationships too at different times with a few in the body of Christ we have connected with....love my heart brother Brian, beautiful Stephen John in Christ, and by the way, is so beautiful in Him, wow........and through this relationship I learnt and experience the love coming from a man towards His sister, just like absalom and I love how He treats His wife and is there for her in an amazing way, so I know all men don't suck and there are beautiful men in here too, that don't suck, as there are beautiful men in the body of Christ that also don't suck...and in the ones I thought sucked and were behaving awful, I can see a hurting too, a beauty that touches my heart and I feel His compassion and it compels me to flow His Grace, Love, Care and Concern...wow...and that is only by His Grace that can happen...

And when He renews and recharges and vitalises you, and noruishes you, this has/d a beautiful effect and we received a beautiful trust, believe/f, love, hope and faith, we subsituted our faith, hope, love, believe/f, trust and we received His...and this effected different people around us and yes the community region too...wow

Lord Jesus Christ has been turning on the light in His women, children and people's lives this is His eyes, His vision , His Glory and this stops and gets people out of spiritual blindness, nor more deceived...because people see His truth...and yes even the truth we would rather deny or have hidden away because it hurts too much...and then we come to a realisation we have all treated God like jerks and we have been jerks to each other too at times..and every one of us, all falls short of the Glory of Lord Jesus Christ, that's why we all need Him, even when He saves us and I am so glad it is that way, cause I love that no matter where He leads me, I need Him, even to breathe, because He even gives us all His breath, we can not even move without Him, because it is Him that does the moving in us, it His Him that propels all life, and then He even gives us free will, to give Him back the will He gave us, to then accept His, wow we then live for Him....and His is so much more awesoem than our will could ever be...

I am breathing the breath that you gave us to breathe to worship you...(brought forth through Matt Redman)

and then we go into repentance and cry out of His realisation...and we see the truth in our selves too...and then we ask for His forgiveness first...and then we can walk and live in that forgiveness (and yes we must take our part and responsibility of being in and being a part of a sucky relationship...so He can help and lead us into a better relationship) and then from that forgiveness flows through to others, ...because we are not only forgiven, the flow of His love now comes forth and we get His grace, and others can get grace too.... how awesome is that and we no more walk in the dark, tossed to or fro because of what we see...for we are a people that trust in Lord Jesus Christ's unseen, we live by His Faith, through Grace...Praise Lord Jesus Christ, amen. Brenda, Then we start to pray for the solutions to the problems.

Brenda, dear Sister, That doesn't mean that men are getting off the hook either at this time and His women have to do it all, even though for some they have to live two roles for a very long time and have not had the helping hands they have needed and have cried out for deliverance...He is our hands,and when we raise up to the challenge, mate we are blessed with expanded skills and capabilites that He then gifts us and we can then go and help others.... praise Lord Jesus Christ...amen...

what some men are getting this season is His ear, this means they will hear Him, whether supernaturally or through His people and also are getting His Grace, because Grace comes through the ear...and this will soften their hearts, this is to combat spiritual deafness, the hardening of hearts and also to deal with the inability that some men just can't hear women at all....and it is also so they stop seeing when women are expressing as nagging, or whining or complaining...when they are expessing their hurt anger and frustration that comes from not being heard nor listened too....
and spiritual deafness hardens people's heart if we give into it...and so what your hubby is needing is a good strong dose of His voice, His Truth and His amazing Sovereign Grace along with the Lord's eyes, being His Glory ....being His fulness with His completion...no more seperate no more splits living the trying to live as one, but not just being married to Him but also in Him and one with each other and only He can touch people with reconciliation, give it into their hearts...and it comes into their vision...it is a beautiful God given gift to us...because Lord Jesus Christ died for each one of us, so we could be reconciled not only to Him, but each other, and be the body of Christ Lord Jesus Christ prayed about in John 17. And when He ascended into heaven, He went into the place that was His and so He was reconciled to the Father (Lord) and to the Ghost (Christ) in Heaven, and He became Lord Jesus Christ and He made known His name to all His people and His name is powerful as He is powerful....this is the heavenly butterfly and the meaning of butterflies, the splits are the wings and our reconciler is in the middle being His Body and head...men are in one wing, women are in the other wing and He is the one that does the moving, the flying...so both are flying united...glory and grace flying together in Love,harmony and unity or Faith Hope and love, our beautiful three in one God...who loves using three in ones......Praise Lord Jesus Christ

And Lord Jesus Christ being the divine reconciler, being it didn't just happen in Heaven being the reconciled oneness of Him to His Father and the Christ, but also it is about being one in Him in earth,flowing out of His heart, through the blood stream, being the blood, water and Spirit (air, oxygen), the river of Life, the river of His Majestic Grace that flows from His throne, His Heart, His love, and goes right on through to us, when we accept His drink, His cup of His new covenant...amazing..wow the heavenly with the earthly witness wow.

And so Brenda take your focus off your hubby, His errors and His behaviour, and put it onto Lord Jesus Christ, and what He is doing... and have a resprite and go right now where you r into Lord Jesus Christ's refuge, ask Lord Jesus Christ to supernaturally bring you into John 14:20, Psalm 91, and Psalm 23, and feed you with this, along with His river of life and His meat and it becomes every part of who You are in Him, and know that He loves you deeply, even if your hubby is behaving like a jerk, and He will soothe all your hearts, and yes now I feel your pain and mate we are crying for you...and the prayers of a wailing, lamenting and crying woman are very powerful....it is so important to be in His divine cocoon at this time, we are protected inside and out...John 14:20

Brenda, remember Mary she cried over Him and and she also annointed His feet with perfumed fragrant oil, and dried them with Her hair...and even though judas and simon went a nit picking at His women when the crying over Him and pouring of His oil and drying them with Her hair took place; to Him this is a beautiful fragrance our salty tears, it is a washing in our glory, being our hair, and He then becomes our beautiful covering....and for our griefs that we take to Him, He unleashes His mercies...and He loves our hair even when it is dried out weathered hair He loves us deeply, every part of us and nourishes even our covering of our hair upon our head...and as He appeared to the samaritan woman, and said Come to me and I will give you life giving water to drink, the samitarian woman had a sucky time too...and so for her this was wow just what she needed because she was in a relationship with someone she knew was not her husband...and the Lord knew too...and He was giving her a lifeline, a way out of her predicament and into Him...and told Her who He was flat out....where with the others He had not done this with...

And so go to Him Brenda, He has the arms that heal, the heart that soothes and the means to deliver You and your situation, be with Him and ask Him for you to go into His cocoon, His blanket His John 14:20 and then you will have everything you need not only to receive the fullness of Lord Jesus Christ's minsitery to you, you can then be directed by Him, to reach out right now to Your husband and your family and bring them deeper into Him...for the devourer and the wolves in sheeps'clothing has been devouring His flock and family,stealing from women and children long enough....and so we are with You at this time...and the prayers are happening....also at this time, we have also come across women who also love Him, and are being abused, in awful relationships and marriages and yes even by those who come with a devout christian exterior...these women are all crying out to Him at this time...you are not alone in this because this is a huge global problem.

And a part of a song that is coming to us at this time is...

I hear you calling me....and you are hear and you here us and we hear You oh Lord....

Lord Jesus Christ, we are calling out for you and to You that every one of us, receive Your beautiful Sovereign Grace, right where we all are, no matter our need, through Your faith, through Your patience and longsuffering, and through Your humility, Lord Jesus Christ, that all these help us bare at the times what are like the unbearable, and when people normally bail out, Lord Jesus Christ, give us all the strength and perserverance to endure and Lord Jesus Christ may we all receive and accept your beautiful amazing intimate, love relationship in and with YOu Lord Jesus Christ, amen....Lord Jesus Christ we love being in Your deep abiding and sustaining love, may all your people know this depth, breadth, width, length, height that this love entails and the lengths you go to and for us, and right along with us, you are sharing our pain through this and we share in yours, and then you shine Your Hope right on into our Hearts, and we see the light of this Hope in the darkness and we walk in and with this Hope that you give us...Lord Jesus Christ soak Brenda in your deep beautiful Love but also give every one of your people, in particular in this situation and an amazing encounter of You in the Heavenly and earthly witness coming together in this situation and every situation around the world where abuse and persecution of all your people are happening.....Lord Jesus Christ, You have everything we need, we are saying Yes and amen to you, keep,nourish and sustain Brenda, her family, Your body of Christ and your lost, so we can all get through what we need to get through and all come into Your place for us, that Brenda and her family and all your family no longer have their good stolen away from you or us........in Lord Jesus Christ's name amen.

Brenda, the problem you are facing is with Lady folly who has been seducing men for a long time, leading them into spiritual adultery and turning His women into herself, being Lady folly and her many ways they are expressed....until we all wake up and we run into Him and into Lady Virtue and we get wisdom, understanding and the knowledge and we have needed, and eve did not receive, because of being seduced, and so we need to enter Him and bite off the tree of Life and drink in the river of Life, being the fruit of Lady Virtue/Wisdom....and that is what the message for you now and a lot of people at this time, to give up their lives, to give up their will and accept His will and life for them, no matter where they are, or what they are standing upon or even the soil they have lived in and built upon ...and as people do this, they receive His meat, being to Come, belive in and on My Son and I will give you eternal life,and we get His drink and He says I will give you Life giving water, I will deliver You out, I will save you, not only You those who are mine that are also with YOu....I will not fail you, trust in Me and I will give You the Life and Love you have always been loning for, were wanting and needed and did not receive...receive from My fulness, completion and perfection, and out of you will flow My life giving waters...for in you my daughters of Zion I have placed the wellsprings of Life my life giving waters will flow out of your belly as the light will flow from your eyes...and your sons will be married to you....and they will then see and hear me in You...coming through You, Praise Lord Jesus Christ amen.

Brenda, the other problem you are having with your hubby, as with a lot of people, it is one of appetite and stomach, belly...what they have an appetite for...being drinking of the water that makes people thirsty and leads to death...it is time Oh Lord that the ones you are touching fully see your life giving water at this time and they can hear you above the rabble and all the unnecessary noise, amen.

Brenda He is here for you, with you and in you as His people, Your Family in Christ are here for You too....and I am still crying Brenda He loves You and He is our life giver and saviour, amen Lord Jesus Christ, thankyou for your touch, thankyou that we can cry with each other and out for each other and know that we are a and belong to a family that cares for each one of us, for we are all important to you...everyone of us....for you even number the hairs on our heads and know each one ...and not one of your children, people is lost, or stolen away, amen Lord Jesus Christ....Dear beautiful Heavenly Husband and Father thankyou for this verse in this song Be My Light Vision....Lord Jesus Christ, flood Your beautiful light vision through Brenda's eyes, into Her heart, and open them up so she may be who you created her to be in Your fullness..and she can see Your vision and plans and solutions in all of this, but have You also to give her movement into putting them them into action and your strenth to do whatever is necessary, and seeing Your vision (fullness, glory/light) plans (completion, saving sovereign grace) and solution (perfection, your unity and oneness, your majesty and majestic)..
and also hears your pipe, your harp and your trumpet all sounding together...being your faith, patience and humility.

also at this time, dear beautiful Lord Jesus Christ, may Brenda experience Your moving as with all your people and may she realise in Your beautiful fulness that is You that do the doing....and also Lord Jesus Christ open up the ears of her hubby, and every single man of God that are yours, so that Her hubby, and all hubbies, dads and men can hear you everywhere throughout the earth and your beautiful life giving sound flow right through His ear and into His heart, so it will no more be hardened to not only Brenda but also you...Lord Jesus Christ touch this Body's family every part and flow your Life giving water through it your sovereign Grace, Your amazing majestic Grace....nourishing and sustaining...amen

and Lord Jesus Christ thankyou that You are our rock, even in the midst of any storm, you are the rock that helps us to stand firm no matter what is going on...and as we focus on you, and give you every problem and stress we have, and we trust you with these not taking them back, that you then apply your life giving solutions....May we always be a receptive and accepting people for You and the Body of Christ, a burning lamp and lightened to a darkened and hardened world...Lord Jesus Chirst keep on softening us all....amen

Brenda what is coming to me, in the garden for you, in the Songs of Solomon 6, 7, 8. also it is a time of decision for the multitude to be in Isaiah 12 or 13, and that is also going through Isaiah 11....and so people are making decisions...as He is making decisions and it all comes down to what are and has been in people's hearts...that is the fruit that you have been seeing, that grew veins and bore fruit...and that this fruit needs His covering of the Heavenly and earthly withness see 1 John 5:7-8, and it is removed and there comes a place then the Godly divine fruit of Him will replace it. this song is for you and every woman that has ever cried out to Him because of the pains they have endured ...

Glorify Your Name (brought forth through Darlene Zxchech and David Holmes and Hillsong Music (c)2004)

Jesus Jesus
Holy One
You call me closer
Clearly like a song I've always known
You would play for me.

Jesus Jesus
On the Cross You took my shame
Forever from my heart I say
I live to worship You, Lord
My King of Glory
Your Brought me to Life
Gave me wings to fly (You are Holy)
Heaven and Earth declare Your Praise
Both Now and Evermore
I glorify Your name,

amen Lord Jesus Christ thanks for this beautiful song and much needed answer, Praise You Lord Jesus Christ amen...

Brenda He also gives me other songs too at this time and so we will put them on another post in this prayer section titled, for all those in sucky difficult situations and relationships...

Peace be with You and in You our Prince of Peace for He is with you, even in the thick of it....

the winds of change, the whirlwinds of Him....Sovereign Grace....Amazing

Glory, Honour, Power and Blessings in Lord Jesus Christ amen

Serenity Grace
Homeheart Ministeries,
His heart is in our home and our home is in His heart...John 14:20
it's all in his hands, heart, feet, mind and side and upon His back....or blood/ water,
love/fire, mercy-truth/earth, grace/glory-air, virtue/liberty,
(metal)=freedom=warm emersion and life under His covering...


the fullness and completion of Him into His perfection, Praise Lord Jesus Christ, amen.

light, sound, speech, love....amazingly majestic

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Serenity,

Brenda, rest assured that God bottles every tear and knows your every concern. He may seem far away, but seek Him even more, with the thought that He is working on your behalf. At some time you will see His great and mighty hand in your situation. You are in my thoughts and prayers that God will make a way where there seems to be no way. May He bless you with His protective loving arms in the shadow of His wings. (Psalm 91)

In His love,

Chelki

Brenda, I know the feeling of frustration and complete lack of control. Your hands are tied; there is nothing you can do that you haven’t done. One’s a preacher told us; “What God has done, No man can undo and what God has said He will do!”
Praise the name the lord Jesus for that. In this simple but very true saying, it’s as simple as that. Pray, believe in the promise that what God has said He will be true to bring it into completion. This is your testimony to see just what God can do. You are in my prayers.

My name is Brent. I am in the middle of a Divorce. I pray daily that my wife and I reconcile. We have an 11 year old daughter involved as well. I blame myself entirely for our breakup. I was very verbally abusive to my wife for the majority of our 16 year marriage. During the past month, I have hurt in a way I've never hurt. I have, on a number of occasions, experienced suicidal ideations. I wondered where my God was! Why was this happening to me, to us? God revealed to me a part of this puzzle. I always knew God. I accepted Jesus into my heart as my personal Savior, who died on the cross to save us from our sins. But, the key, I NEVER walked with him. In the mist of my pain, I cried out to God, "God, Help Me" I fell to my knees and repented to the Lord and then accepted the Holy Spirit in my heart. It was the beginning of an amazing transformation. Praise God. Since that time I have still undergone attacks from Satan, who set out to discourage me. I had to learn to focus on the face of God during these attacks. I would eventually prevail. I had to learn to let go of my way and surrender all to Him. I still struggle with letting go, but that is gradually becomming easier. I KNOW that I KNOW that God Almighty has a purpose and a plan for me, and for my wife. When my wife left me, God gave me His word for me to stand on during this trial. He to me that He did not make our circumstance happen, but he Did allow it to happen. I had to be broken so God could mold me to his liking, to his likeness. My marriage had to crumble to the ground so he could mold it to his liking and likness as well. I stand on His word every day. It is hard at times, but God never promised that it would be easy or painless. There are times I feel like it's all too much but somehow, God reveals to me a glimps of his plan. He shows me hope.

So, hold your head high, focus on Jesus, and His purpose will unfold.

This experience is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through, but look at was glorious things have come from it. Pray, Pray, Pray, every day. Be persistant in prayer. Remember, God loves you.

God bless you and your husband. He WILL make things right.

Brent- sounds like God is doing some great things in your heart despite the difficulties in your life. I know that He will honor your new heart toward Him in the future. He will carry your burdens and give you rest. Continue to find ways to glorify Him through this process with your family. I will pray that God will heal the wounds in you, your wife, and your daughter’s heart during this difficult time.

(1 Kings 8:46-51) 46 "When they sin against you—for there is no one who does not sin—and you become angry with them and give them over to the enemy, who takes them captive to his own land, far away or near; 47 and if they have a change of heart in the land where they are held captive, and repent and plead with you in the land of their conquerors and say, 'We have sinned, we have done wrong, we have acted wickedly'; 48 and if they turn back to you with all their heart and soul in the land of their enemies who took them captive, and pray to you toward the land you gave their fathers, toward the city you have chosen and the temple I have built for your Name; 49 then from heaven, your dwelling place, hear their prayer and their plea, and uphold their cause. 50 And forgive your people, who have sinned against you; forgive all the offenses they have committed against you, and cause their conquerors to show them mercy; 51 for they are your people and your inheritance, whom you brought out of Egypt, out of that iron-smelting furnace.


(Mathew 11:27-29)27"All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.

28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.